THE LEORA LETTER

Slut-shaming matters because when people are dismissed as sluts, hoes, and thots, they are denied care and compassion as human beings and in a variety of situations, including when they are sexually harassed, sexually assaulted, and need an abortion.

Actor Keke Palmer was called out by her boyfriend. Was it because she wore a bodysuit beneath a sheer dress at an Usher concert? Not exactly. It was because she wore a bodysuit beneath a sheer dress at an Usher concert as a mom.

“It’s the outfit tho…you a mom," Darius Jackson, father of their son, complained publicly on Twitter. Jackson later added, again in a tweet, “We live in a generation where a man of the family doesn’t want the wife & mother to his kids to showcase booty cheeks to please others & he gets told how much of a hater he is."

"This is my family & my representation," he continued. "I have standards & morals to what I believe. I rest my case."

USA Today asked me for my reaction. I pointed out that Jackson was outraged not by Palmer's outfit per se but because she had violated his particular norms of femininity.

In addition, when he said, “This is my family,” Jackson implied that he owns Palmer and has the right to control her.

Jackson seems to regard women as sexually innocent virgins, wives, or mothers—or as dirty sluts and hoes. In his opinion, Palmer should strive to appear sexually innocent.

This kind of thinking suggests that only some women deserve to be treated with respect. The fact that Jackson shamed Palmer in public on Twitter confirms that he believes it is acceptable to inflict her with psychological harm.

Jackson defended his reprehensible behavior by saying, “I have standards.” Note his usage of the plural—he has different standards for different women. Freudian slip? In fact, there should be one standard for everyone (regardless of gender).

Learn more about this sad slut-shaming incident in USA Today.

Key takeaway: All women, and especially entertainers, are pressured to look sexy. Whatever you think about this situation, denigrating a woman for looking sexy because she is a parent feeds sexist double standards suggesting that only some women deserve to be treated with empathy, kindness, and respect.